091207

Today is kind of blah day. It started off okay. I put up the xmas tree and some decorations. Did some cleaning and such. Then came to work.

I've been feeling very depressed the past week or so. I know I'm moving down into that time of year for me, and I have been trying to keep myself 'up' and moving, BUT it's been quite difficult. Most of the time I just want to turn totally inward, stay inside and lock the world out. I don't want to go anywhere, or do anything, or see anyone. And then I get bored and need to do something, but still not go outside.

I HATE Utica. No, perhaps I really despise it, if that's a stronger word than hate. It's a cesspool. I feel the energy just being sucked out of me. I've been really hating people, strangers...people I'm supposed to have and cultivate love and compassion for. I'm losing faith and hope in humanity. I'm annoyed with what I call those who are voluntarily ignorant: they choose to ignore many truths, perceptions, and/or possibilities, or refuse to open their minds to other what they've been taught and told what was right and the truth.

Oh well. More on this later.

Blessings